LOLCATS ARE EVERYWHERE

(Sing this to the tune of Love is In The Air. The unitalicized parts are spoken.)

IM ON UR BALCONY
PEEKIN' THROUGH UR WINDOWPANE

UNDERNEATH UR LINDEN TREE
WITH A SONGBIRD I HAVE SLAIN

and if you think that something is hidden
that you've got it safely tucked away
i assure you it won't stay forbidden
because seek and destroy's how we play!

IM CRUISIN' UR PANTRY
LOOKIN' FOR MY FAVORITE SNACKS

I TAKE DOWN NOTES FROM UR CORK BOARD
LINE UR COMPUTER CHAIR WITH TACKS

lolcats are always on missions
on a stealth undercover foray
we dont lolly-gag making decisions
we're the cats that have something to say

lolcats are everywhere oo--oo-oo woo--oo-oo
lolcats are everywhere oo--oo-oo woo--oo-oo

Waiter, there's LOLCAT in my soup!
It`s catching Albondigas!

Waiter, now the cat is in my salad, what's it doing there?
Stalking animal cracker croutons!

IM IN UR DRESSER DRAWER
TRYIN' ON UR UNDERWEAR

I BRING FIELD MICE TO UR DOOR
'CAUSE I ALWAYS LIKE TO SHARE

the pond in ur yard is inviting
it's more fun than a big ball of twine
got my eyes peeled for the next frog sighting
all ur base koi are gonna be mine

lolcats are everywhere oo--oo-oo woo--oo-oo
lolcats are everywhere oo--oo-oo woo--oo-oo

Why did the lolcat cross the road?
To look for a cheeseburger!

Harry Potter Song

(The sad violin music that accompanies the Harry Potter movies is really quite touching. But I prefer something with more pep. Sing the following words to the tune of the Jakers cartoon theme.)

This is the story of a young wizard
He lives with muggles, in conditions foul
But he knew he was destined for greatness
When his mother sent him an owl

Harry, Ronnie, and Hermione
Study magic at the academy
Incantations and Quidditch
But there's a mysterious enemy

If you'd like to learn levitation
And meet mythical beasts of old
There's a charm for every occasion
Some day we'll turn lead into gold

Dang'rous secrets are hidden in Hogworts
Don't believe everything that you see
This potion calls for frog hearts
We love the life of Wizardry